Coworker

Dear Shawn,

I’m working with a guy I’ve known since I moved to Houston. A few days after my move, I went to a party hosted by a fellow flight attendant. I met quite a few other flight attendants there, including a couple who I found out a few months later had broken up. Seems he was having an affair in Lima, Peru. She found out, they got a quick a divorce, and now they both have new significant others. He’s married the woman, she’s moved in and has a business with her new boyfriend.

I never knew them all that well. After the party, she and I became friends on Facebook. One day she asked me about my job, which was surprising to me, since I thought she was a flight attendant. Turns out she wasn’t, only he was. We’ve remained friends and she decided on another path that kept her feet more firmly on the ground.

Her ex and I were never as close. He knew we’d met at that party, but since we never got into a deep conversation and we never became friends on social media, we didn’t have any other connections. We see one another at work often, and always smile and say hello. I don’t know that he knows I’m on-line friends with his ex, and I never mention a word about it to him.

The first few times I saw him, he was friendly and jovial. He was fun to talk to, was a caring individual and it was difficult to see how he could cheat on his gorgeous wife so easily. The last few times I’ve flown with him, he seems much more withdrawn and reserved. He never joins when the crew goes for drinks after our flights to South America and he doesn’t seem to engage others in meaningful conversation during flight. He likes to work the galley, which tends to keep him away from people, for the most part.

Recently, we worked together again, and it wasn’t until after the initial service when I found out that his wife was on board! I thought it odd that he wouldn’t mention this in briefing with the crew before we left, as most would done, “Oh, hey, I’m bringing my wife, husband, sister, friend, on this flight today...”

I know this is petty, so I’ll apologize in advance, but as nice as she was, she was a bit homely- certainly not as attractive as his ex. Must be great in bed, as some say! He warmed up when she was around, but then got very rigid again when she was gone. I saw them together in the hotel at lunch. I approached to say hello. She smiled back at me and had pleasant eye contact, but didn’t really say anything. Odd, but then I realized that she mustn't speak English well.

On our flight home, I asked him where his wife was. He said she was staying in Peru. I asked if he had another trip down, back to back. It’s not uncommon for a flight attendant to do that- have two trips, and the other party remain for the day or so in between, and then they fly home together after the second trip. I was correct. She would be staying with friends. 

Turns out, she was from this South American city. Now, he didn’t say as much, but I assume they met on one of his layovers. That must be how the affair started. I wondered how long he had been dating her, going to South America, before his ex wife caught on. Such a shame.

It was nice to meet her and put the pieces of the puzzle together. I still like to fly with him, and I hope I get to know her better. I'll just not mention it to my other friend.